.comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}
Outright Mental Defective
Saturday, April 30, 2005
  Reducing Deadly Crashes
The United States could reduce alcohol-related deadly crashes by giving improved access to substance abuse treatment while reducing the accessibility of alcohol, according to a new study by the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA), part of the National Institutes of Health (NIH). The study appears in the April, 2005 issue of the Journal Injury Prevention.
Friday, April 29, 2005
  Beating Their Addictions?
The April 14, 2005 edition the Moscow Times.Com heralded a Siberian method of treating alcoholism. It litterally beating the acholic patient with a flexiable rod. And we though our first sponser was bad.
Thursday, April 28, 2005
  Thought for April 28, 2005
Live and let live.
Wednesday, April 27, 2005
  Sharing Our Unmanageable Lives
We have heard it said that, “thirteenth step is when you combine the first step and the twelfth step.” In other words, “my life is unmanageable and I want to share it with you.”
Monday, April 25, 2005
  Sponser v. Therapist
Sobercity.com offers us "12 Ways to Tell the Difference Between Your Sponser and Your Thearapist."
Friday, April 22, 2005
  Hey, Hey Paula
I can never remember exactly but, Paula Abdul’s birth date is within six months of mine. A recent article about her suspected substance abuse problem got me to thinking. When we were in our mid twenties she spent as much time in the headlines as I was spending in treatment, halfway houses and other institutions. I remember sitting in the dayroom of one of those facilities and reading a newspaper article about her. At the time I mistakenly thought “man I wish I had her talent I would not be here.” Well, I have no idea if she has a problem or not but it does bring home that old saying “don’t judge your insides by someone else outsides.” You know who else is almost exactly my age, Whitney Houston is. God bless the both of them.
Monday, April 18, 2005
  Effort and Outcome
The effort is up to you the outcome is up to God.
Sunday, April 17, 2005
Regardless how hard we try some of our sponsees will not stay sober. On the other hand some sponsees will ignore all of our advice, work the program “ass backwards” if at all and will stay sober despite our repeated warnings to the contrary. In either case, if we were conscientious in our efforts with her are not at fault. It is after all the grace of God and not us that sobers the alcoholic. If we managed to stay sober while working with other alcoholics our efforts have been a success.
Friday, April 15, 2005
  Our Own Skin
For many of us The Program was where we learned, often for the very fist time, to live in our own skin. Some of us never wanted to be ourselves. From our earliest memories, we wanted to live somewhere else, do something else and be someone else. Often this flight from reality started long before we ever tasted alcohol. Alcohol however, added fuel to our escape. No matter what people told us the next day, we were convinced that we sounded better, looked better and felt better after “a few” drinks. When we hit our bottom and had to stop or die, we could no longer rely on a drink to help ease ourselves into our own existence. So we reemerged in our own skin whether we wanted to or not. At first it often can be hard to feel through the fog but eventually we have to face life as ourselves without the narcotic affects of alcohol. This can at times be a painful place. If we are diligent in our program in other words, if we clean house, find God and help others we will begin to recover and in recovery we become alright with ourselves. We learn often joyfully to face life as ourselves just for today.
Tuesday, April 12, 2005
  Gratitude Revisited
Hey I have moved to http://soberrant.blogger.com
Monday, April 11, 2005
  Heard It
Think, think, think
Saturday, April 09, 2005
  Heard It
The 12 steps are suggestions in the same way that pulling the rip cord of your parachute while sky diving is a suggestion.
Nothing changes if nothing changes.
Monday, April 04, 2005
  A God of My Understanding
“If you want to stay sober,” the old timer told me, “you will have to get a God of your understanding, a higher power.” At the time that was an intimidating task. I believed in God, at least academically. The God of my understanding however, was not my higher power, I had no faith. You see my God was a very detached yet punitive parent. I conceded that this God probably could restore me to sanity but, I seriously doubted that he would. Instead I imagined my God looking down and saying “you got yourself into this now get yourself out of it.”
Fortunately along with this doubt, I had the “gift of desperation.” So when people told me to act as if I had a merciful God who could and would restore me to sanity, I did. I learned how to ask my God for help staying sober in the morning and thanking my God at night. Not long after I saw the miracles starting to happen not only in my life but the lives of those around me. Little by little I came to believe in a merciful and loving God. Today I believe in a God who not only can restore me but restores me everyday.
Sunday, April 03, 2005
  No Gratitude
Many years ago now a counselor at a half-way house told me that I had no gratitude. She was right I would later discover but, at the time I had no idea what the word really meant. She told me to look it up in the dictionary but, the definition made no sense to me. Armed with this definition I did not understand, I was supposed to look for people in the house who had gratitude. All I found were clueless idiots who were oblivious to the gravity of their situation. In my arrogance I wondered why I, who had “never caught a break,” should be grateful. Without even asking she told me why, in spite of what I thought I had “caught a break” by getting sober and if I wanted to stay that way I would need to become grateful. I said incredulously, “You don’t want me just to fake it do you?” She told me that she did not care if I had to fake it. She also told me that I needed to write down a gratitude list of at least 25 things every morning. I baulked at the assignment but, not wanting to get kicked out of the house, I did it anyway. There is a lot to be said for doing things anyway. By doing it anyway slowly and at times painfully, I began to become grateful. Today I see where my sobriety has brought me and at times I get glimpse into the lives of those who did not stay sober. Today I do not have to fake it, I am grateful.
Saturday, April 02, 2005
Powerless, in the beginning the very word filled me with shame. It is not that I did not know I was powerless. In fact, I felt powerless over so many things. The word powerless had such a sting in it for me. It suggested my private weakness made public. My deepest fear that I was a silly weak woman and I did not measure up was now on displayed like a neon sign. An old timer assured me that it was a paradox and it would one day make sense. “You’ll understand that you gain power by admitting your powerlessness just as you get by giving,” she said but I did not understand. Today I understand. I do not know when or exactly how that changed for me. By going to meeting and working the steps one day I realized that I saw things differently. Today I am not ashamed to freely admit how powerless I am over so many things and to rely on the only real power there is the God of my understanding.
Outright Mental Defective is an ongoing conversation about living sober one day at a time. http://soberrant.blogspot.com/

My Photo
Location: Connecticut, United States
04/01/1990 - 05/01/1990 / 01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005 / 03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005 / 04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005 / 05/01/2005 - 06/01/2005 / 06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005 / 07/01/2005 - 08/01/2005 / 08/01/2005 - 09/01/2005 / 09/01/2005 - 10/01/2005 / 10/01/2005 - 11/01/2005 / 11/01/2005 - 12/01/2005 / 12/01/2005 - 01/01/2006 / 01/01/2006 - 02/01/2006 / 02/01/2006 - 03/01/2006 / 03/01/2006 - 04/01/2006 / 04/01/2006 - 05/01/2006 / 05/01/2006 - 06/01/2006 / 06/01/2006 - 07/01/2006 / 07/01/2006 - 08/01/2006 / 08/01/2006 - 09/01/2006 / 09/01/2006 - 10/01/2006 / 10/01/2006 - 11/01/2006 / 11/01/2006 - 12/01/2006 / 12/01/2006 - 01/01/2007 / 01/01/2007 - 02/01/2007 / 02/01/2007 - 03/01/2007 / 03/01/2007 - 04/01/2007 / 04/01/2007 - 05/01/2007 / 05/01/2007 - 06/01/2007 / 06/01/2007 - 07/01/2007 / 07/01/2007 - 08/01/2007 / 08/01/2007 - 09/01/2007 / 09/01/2007 - 10/01/2007 / 10/01/2007 - 11/01/2007 / 11/01/2007 - 12/01/2007 / 12/01/2007 - 01/01/2008 / 01/01/2008 - 02/01/2008 / 02/01/2008 - 03/01/2008 / 03/01/2008 - 04/01/2008 / 05/01/2008 - 06/01/2008 / 06/01/2008 - 07/01/2008 / 07/01/2008 - 08/01/2008 / 09/01/2009 - 10/01/2009 /

Listed on BlogShares Subscribe with Bloglines Powered by Blogger

Who Links Here
  • Higher Powered
  • AAwakenings
  • A Day in the Life ...
  • A Dozen Steps
  • A Journal of Recovery from Alcoholism
  • Among the Living
  • A Reason, A Season, A Lifetime.
  • Alcoholic Brain
  • As I See It
  • Anonymous Alcoholic
  • Anonymous Biker
  • Another Door Opens
  • Attitude of Gratitude
  • Because I Said So
  • Big Sky mAAck dAAddy
  • CAIM Treatment
  • Castor's Diary
  • Coffee Bitch
  • CreAAtive Intelligence
  • Dragon Speak
  • Dr. Jekyll vs Mr. Hyde
  • dry blog
  • Emerging sideways
  • Expanding My Wings
  • Gotta Be Me
  • half-nAAked Thursday
  • I'll never drink again!
  • It's a girl thing
  • Jedi Master
  • Journey to Recovery
  • lonestarsteve
  • matt v 2.0
  • My Life in Tampa
  • New Beginnings
  • OneDayOneStep
  • OneGayAtATime
  • One Year Viewed From Space
  • Outright Mental Defective
  • Postcards
  • rAAnch - a round up of friends ...
  • Road of Happy Destiny
  • Recovery Road
  • Recovery Ruminations
  • Scout's Newcomer Daze
  • Simply Anna
  • Sincerely Sober
  • Sober @ Sundown
  • Sober Chick
  • Soberlogger
  • Sobering Thoughts
  • Sober Nuggets
  • Sobriety is Exhausting
  • Sobriety Society
  • Teachable alcoholic
  • The Boy Who Knits
  • This can't be it
  • The Daily Piglet
  • The Lady Geek
  • The Toa of Jeremy
  • This Unmanageable Life
  • Today
  • Twelvebeads
  • Vicarious Rising
  • You and Me
  • What is Your Deepest Fear?