Better warm up the chopper.
 

You still have the measurements I sent you from the last time.
 

I guess you won't be able to get it done.

If Noah lived in the United States today: The Lord spoke to him and said, “In one year, I am going to make it rain and cover the whole earth with water until all flesh is destroyed. But I want you to save the righteous people and two of every kind of living thing on the earth. Therefore, I am commanding you to build an Ark.”

In a flash of lightning, God delivered the specifications for an Ark. In fear and trembling, Noah took the plans and agreed to build the Ark. Remember,” said the Lord, “you must complete the Ark and bring everything aboard in one year.”

Exactly one year later, fierce storm clouds covered the earth, and all the seas of the earth went into a tumult. The Lord saw that Noah was sitting in his front yard weeping. “Noah,” He shouted, “where is the Ark?” “Lord, please forgive me,” cried Noah. “I did my best, but there were big problems. First, I had to get a permit for construction, and your plans did not meet the codes. I had to hire an engineering firm and redraw the specification. Then I got into a fight with OSHA over whether or not the Ark needed a fire sprinkler system and flotation devices.

Then my neighbor objected, claiming I was violating zoning ordinances by building the Ark in my front yard. So I had to get a variance from the city planning commission. Then I had problems getting enough wood for the Ark, because there was a ban on cutting trees to protect the Spotted Owl.

“I finally convinced the U.S. Forest Service that I needed the wood to save the owls. However, the Fish and Wildlife Service won’t let me catch any owls. So no owls.

“The carpenters formed a union and went on strike. I had to negotiate a settlement with the National Labor Relations Board before anyone would pick up a saw or a hammer. Now I have sixteen carpenters on the Ark, but still no owls.

“When I started rounding up the other animals, I got sued by an animal rights group. They objected to me taking two of each kind aboard. “Just when I got the suit dismissed, the EPA notified me that I could not complete the Ark without filing an environmental impact statement on your proposed flood. They didn’t take very kindly to the idea that they had no jurisdiction over the conduct of the Creator of the Universe. “Then the Army Engineers demanded a map of the proposed new flood plan.

I sent them a globe. Right now, I am trying to resolve a complaint filed with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission that I am practicing discrimination by not taking godless, unbelieving people aboard the Ark. “The IRS has seized my assets, claiming that I am building the Ark in preparation to flee the country to avoid paying taxes. I also just got a notice from the state that I owe them some kind of user tax and failed to register the Ark as a ‘recreational water craft.’

“Finally, the ACLU got the courts to issue an injunction against further construction of the Ark, saying that since God is flooding the earth, it is a religious event and therefore unconstitutional.

“I really don’t think I can finish the Ark for another five or six years,” Noah wailed. The sky began to clear, the sun began to shine, and the seas began to calm. A rainbow arched across the sky. Noah looked up hopefully.

“You mean You are not going to destroy the earth, Lord?”

“No,” said the Lord sadly. “I don’t have to. The government already has.”
 

Make sure it has a sauna and power engine.
 

Thanks Big Sky MAAck for the laugh.
 

Just remember to come on up and get me.
I see you,
JJ
 

June rain bring July flowers?
 

OMG BIg MAACK that is sooo funny... poor trudge hang in there
 

I will trade you a heat wave for a day for a flood for a day .lol
(do you think this is global warming?)
 

All this rain can really be a downer. Gotta' get through it, gotta' get through it. That's my rain mantra!
Peace..............
 

I'm with ya Trudge, we've finally been getting our much-needed rain down this'a-way :)

Don't forget JJ :)!
 

Screw the ark get a cruise ship.