Monday, August 08, 2005
Lazy
I stayed after last night’s meeting to talk with Mary Jo. I wanted to ask her for advice on what to do about a new sponsee who is on methadone. It ended up being a discussion on how water down I thought The Program has become in the last few years. She suggested that try a few meeting outside of the “the club” that I go to now. I told her that someone else had suggested that to me too but I said, “I don’t know it is just so convenient to go to the club. She said “well yeah you are right; working the program is all about being easy and convenient for you.” Ouch! She is right though. I have gotten really lazy about my program lately. I been really, really lazy about sponsoring people lately. I don’t push them on stuff. I listen to too much of their crap before I cut them off and direct them back to the steps. I value my friendship with people more than I value telling them the truth sometimes.
¶ 8/08/2005 06:13:00 AM 
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I like to mix up my meetings. I go to different types of meetings at different places. I wasn't always like this but after a while it was the same people saying the same stuff. I'm only good at weeding out the what I need to hear from the what I don't need to hear for so long then it was time to mix it up. Did that make any sense? Welcome home!
Peace,
JJ
Peace,
JJ
I am still new enough (at 2 years) tha complacency is not an issue (yet).
However, in order to stay fresh, I do a lot of different types of service work. Over the weekend, I signed up to participate in the AA Prison Ministry. So I shall have future blog-posts about going into prisons (voluntarily).
However, in order to stay fresh, I do a lot of different types of service work. Over the weekend, I signed up to participate in the AA Prison Ministry. So I shall have future blog-posts about going into prisons (voluntarily).
Is being easily bored a common character defect of alcoholics? It's one of mine...
I was making the rounds of all the evening meetings in town, every night, and got a little restless with hearing the same dozen or so people every day. For awhile I got impatient with discussion meetings altogether, and was going to only speaker meetings and step studies. Now I've been drawn back to meetings at the local recovery home, for the hardcore experience. Sometimes I skip the meeting itself and hang out with the "meeting" on the patio.
I'm too new to have sponsees, but as a sponsee I try to remember that my sponsor's first responsibility is to his own sobriety, and as a sponsor he is working his 12th. He doesn't "push" me as such -- I see that as my own responsibility to work my own program.
A guy shared the other night that he didn't make progress doing the program "his own way," and finally decided to do it "his sponsor's way." I reflected that I don't feel like I'm doing the program "my" way, but I don't really feel like I'm doing it my sponsor's way, either. It seems to be more that my sponsor and I are searching and working out our recoveries together, without either of us trying to exert control over it.
I was making the rounds of all the evening meetings in town, every night, and got a little restless with hearing the same dozen or so people every day. For awhile I got impatient with discussion meetings altogether, and was going to only speaker meetings and step studies. Now I've been drawn back to meetings at the local recovery home, for the hardcore experience. Sometimes I skip the meeting itself and hang out with the "meeting" on the patio.
I'm too new to have sponsees, but as a sponsee I try to remember that my sponsor's first responsibility is to his own sobriety, and as a sponsor he is working his 12th. He doesn't "push" me as such -- I see that as my own responsibility to work my own program.
A guy shared the other night that he didn't make progress doing the program "his own way," and finally decided to do it "his sponsor's way." I reflected that I don't feel like I'm doing the program "my" way, but I don't really feel like I'm doing it my sponsor's way, either. It seems to be more that my sponsor and I are searching and working out our recoveries together, without either of us trying to exert control over it.
getting out of the comfort zone, any lengths etc, thats what my sponsors on at me to do, terrifying, hard work at times, but rewarding.
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